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I'm...not sure. But I was told I was raped when I was 13, and since then I've disassociated. I was raped orally at 14 too. 13 has more holes than 14. I've been raped all my life. Mentally, physically and even spiritually. I don't even know where to begin, but everyone turned against me for being a good person. Everyone hates me for no reason. They steal various parts of my personality. They all turn on me. They even steal my journal names, and my e-mails.
At the end of this, ...I'm just me. Mars. No one will leave me alone. People mentally, emotionally and physically abuse me constantly. They know who I am, they know I'm jesus or someone like him and they end up trying to stop me from saving the world. I'm not delusional. I'm a good person.
They try to make me call them my g, when my Heavenly Father actually is. not on Earth. I'm so scared of sex it's ridiculous. I want a meaningful, healthy relationship, with someone. Everyone has been trying to kill me all my life. Which is why I isolated myself. If I die, Jehovah ends up killing everyone that tried to hurt me, which is a lot of people on Earth. I don't want that, I want everyone to live. I want everyone to be happy and live forever in paradise.
Please just... stop. Okay? Stop. Let me have an escape. The world doesn't last long unless I preach. Please, stop.
I've been proving how much I love these people despite how much they shit on me. I can't do this anymore. I just want to be happy, have an escape and get lost in someone else's headspace for awhile. Please, don't do this to me. I want to be happy. I want to be happy.
Go on youtube, watch videos on being an INFJ/EMPATHY, naricissists cling to me, hurt me and won't let me go. They hurt me until I'm bled dry and begging for mercy. I can't take it anymore. I cant't.
I love you the most. Okay? Please don't hurt me anymore. I love you the most. I'm not outing who you are. I'm just not. You … you kept giving me reactionary therapy through pictures. You kept saying 'Don't worry. Squally loves you.' You kept saying 'I'm not him, and I kinda am. You're not her and you kinda are. Greatest romance of a lifetime huh?' I'm sorry I kept denying you. I love you. I'm sorry. Please be okay? Please? Then you kept saying 'You'd do something like this if you could.' While popping out of that stupid bag. If only I was that small, right?
I wish I had read that cookbook. I'm a dumb. You're the most beautiful man I've ever seen and I actually know who you are as a person. Mr. Cameron Slogoski. It's okay if you deny me. Mars is used to that. Everyone denies my reality.
I let you go before, but it's up to you if you show up.
Audrian, Pookie and all other evil people get lost. Apparently you made me piss myself and be dirty so much, that I had a crouch full of mill worms. *feels so ashamed and grossed out.* I've been disgraced. Literally. Please stay away. I'll never feel worthy of anyone now. Never.
At the end of this, ...I'm just me. Mars. No one will leave me alone. People mentally, emotionally and physically abuse me constantly. They know who I am, they know I'm jesus or someone like him and they end up trying to stop me from saving the world. I'm not delusional. I'm a good person.
They try to make me call them my g, when my Heavenly Father actually is. not on Earth. I'm so scared of sex it's ridiculous. I want a meaningful, healthy relationship, with someone. Everyone has been trying to kill me all my life. Which is why I isolated myself. If I die, Jehovah ends up killing everyone that tried to hurt me, which is a lot of people on Earth. I don't want that, I want everyone to live. I want everyone to be happy and live forever in paradise.
Please just... stop. Okay? Stop. Let me have an escape. The world doesn't last long unless I preach. Please, stop.
I've been proving how much I love these people despite how much they shit on me. I can't do this anymore. I just want to be happy, have an escape and get lost in someone else's headspace for awhile. Please, don't do this to me. I want to be happy. I want to be happy.
Go on youtube, watch videos on being an INFJ/EMPATHY, naricissists cling to me, hurt me and won't let me go. They hurt me until I'm bled dry and begging for mercy. I can't take it anymore. I cant't.
I love you the most. Okay? Please don't hurt me anymore. I love you the most. I'm not outing who you are. I'm just not. You … you kept giving me reactionary therapy through pictures. You kept saying 'Don't worry. Squally loves you.' You kept saying 'I'm not him, and I kinda am. You're not her and you kinda are. Greatest romance of a lifetime huh?' I'm sorry I kept denying you. I love you. I'm sorry. Please be okay? Please? Then you kept saying 'You'd do something like this if you could.' While popping out of that stupid bag. If only I was that small, right?
I wish I had read that cookbook. I'm a dumb. You're the most beautiful man I've ever seen and I actually know who you are as a person. Mr. Cameron Slogoski. It's okay if you deny me. Mars is used to that. Everyone denies my reality.
I let you go before, but it's up to you if you show up.
Audrian, Pookie and all other evil people get lost. Apparently you made me piss myself and be dirty so much, that I had a crouch full of mill worms. *feels so ashamed and grossed out.* I've been disgraced. Literally. Please stay away. I'll never feel worthy of anyone now. Never.